Guest Blog: The three things that matter most about your wedding

Guest Blog: The three things that matter most about your wedding

We’re thrilled that the lovely Rachel from Love By Design Weddings has agreed to be a guest blogger for The Wedding Jar and will be sharing her wedding wisdom with us once a month. Here’s Rachel’s first post all about the things that matter most about your wedding day (and the things that really don’t!). Over to you, Rachel…

Written by Rachel Pertee from Love by Design Weddings

The most important thing when planning your wedding is making decisions that will make both you and your partner happy. Worrying about what your guests are going to love and not love will make you stressed when making wedding plans and deciding where to allocate your budget.

I have been to plenty of weddings – as a wedding supplier, as a guest and as a bride so I have a pretty good idea of what matters most on a big day. However, that’s just my opinion, so I thought it would be a good idea to conduct a survey amongst my own group of friends and family to see what they notice most at weddings, and what they really don’t care about!

So, if you’re wondering what types of things to splurge on and what you can skip all together, take note of this list!

  1. The Atmosphere

This was something that EVERYONE mentioned. And it is the one thing that money cannot buy! Your guests want to feel relaxed and happy. They want to feel the love between the two of you. Here’s what three of my friends said:

“I don’t care about anything else as long as it’s a happy, loving day….could be outside on a clifftop, sat on the floor, and still be the best wedding ever if the couple truly love each other.”

“I don’t care about the glamour or noise from kids or things going wrong. I like it to be genuine and relaxed.”

This is me on my wedding day. My husband makes me laugh every day, and our wedding day was no exception. I love that our photographer captured the essence of our day and our relationship perfectly. Our guests laughed and cried and said it was the happiest day, full of love.

Be yourselves. Relax. It’s all about the two of you declaring your love for each other. As one friend said, “I just care about the loving couple-to-be and the happiness I hope they will enjoy for their lives together.”


2. The Dress

This was top of virtually everyone’s list. When you walk in to your wedding, all eyes will be on you. When you are standing at the front, saying your vows, all eyes will be on you. When you have your first dance, all eyes…..ok, you get the idea!

They will all notice if you are not comfortable in your dress. It’s always a good idea to choose something you feel beautiful in, rather than a dress which makes you feel like a trussed-up chicken! And you will get hot in your dress, even in winter – adrenaline, dancing, wine – they all raise your body temperature – so consider your fabric and the weight of your dress very carefully.

And they all notice DETAILS! There are some stunning dresses with exquisite back details to wow your guests – after all, for the best part of the entire ceremony, this is what they are looking at!

  1. The Décor

A word of advice – when it comes to décor, less is most definitely more. Simplicity is preferred to glitz and glam. However, your personality needs to come through your wedding decorations. Sounds easy, right?

“I notice where something is quirky or different from traditional”.

Think about what you love. What are your hobbies? What are your favourite colours? What time of year are you getting married? What type of venue are you getting married in? If you can bring these altogether, you have your perfect wedding décor!

Let me tell you about my own wedding décor.

My favourite season is autumn. I love the colours of the changing leaves and I love to walk in the forest. I like collecting pine cones. My husband and I met on the 30th October. We got married on the 30th October, so that we could bring our love of autumn into our wedding day. We chose a rustic DIY venue with open fires, stripped floors and beautiful grounds to suit our theme.

It was easy to find huge pine cones and beautiful leaves on our many walks. We picked up mini pumpkins and squash from the supermarket. We used big pumpkins to hold our flowers. We used 4 colours only: orange, red, yellow and green. For chairs sashes and table runners, we chose hessian. We asked friends and family to save jars for us to decorate. It was not expensive but once it was all put together, the look was perfect.


My biggest piece of advice to you is: pay for a wedding venue decorator! By all means, source your own decorations if you can afford to. Make as many as you feel confident doing. But to create the WOW factor, leave the styling of your venue to someone who knows what works and who has the time to spend bringing your dream wedding day to life. Decorating wedding venues is my job, and I love it but I can guarantee it will stress you out if you try to fit in creating the look you want around hair appointments, make-up artists, photographers and last-minute nerves!

So……what really doesn’t matter to your guests? Here’s what our survey said…..

  • Money spent
  • Doves or butterflies
  • Favours
  • Confetti
  • Bridesmaid gifts
  • Receiving lines
  • Presents for all and sundry
  • Flip flops
  • Fancy Invites

Please do not worry about everything your friends have at their weddings. YOU DON’T NEED TO COMPARE YOURSELF! It’s your day, do it your way. Your guests literally don’t care what other people have done – the most important thing for them is that your wedding day reflects what the two of you want and like.

Photo credit: Photos By BW

Venue: The Old Vicarage

Decorations: Love By Design Weddings

To read more about Love By Design Weddings and to contact Rachel visit or 

Rachel also has her own online Etsy shop where you can take a look at some of her bespoke handmade items.